Chapter Ten: A Poem in Seven Steps
“Dang... dang dang!”
As the sharp peal of the copper gong resounded, the examination was over. The clerks in blue robes walked around, pasting slips of paper over the names on each exam script, and only then did they collect them.
This was a rule set by Empress Wu Zetian herself, intended to prevent the examiners from engaging in favoritism or corruption.
Afterward, the candidates began to leave the examination hall in succession.
Li Zhao deliberately dawdled a few steps, falling behind the crowd, and soon spotted the figures of the two fat brothers. Quietly, he followed them, lowering his head and waiting for the right moment.
Soon, a tall candidate strode by briskly... Seizing the opportunity, Li Zhao stretched out his foot!
Whoosh!... Thud... Crash!
The tall young man didn’t notice the foot in his path and immediately went tumbling to the ground. His fall knocked over several people ahead, and the chaos spread, toppling even more, among whom were the brothers Li Chong and Li Fei!
Not only did the two of them end up rolling about like gourds, they also dropped a number of small booklets from their persons, each densely filled with tiny, meticulous handwriting...
“Everyone, look! These two fatties were cheating, they've brought in crib notes!” a loud voice shouted from the crowd.
“Someone cheated? Who?”
“It’s those two fat ones, all their cheat sheets fell out!”
...
Soon, the news spread like wildfire. Candidates crowded around, all well aware of the cheating incident.
Seeing the situation was turning against them, Li Chong and Li Fei tried to escape, but the crowd was so dense there was simply no way out.
“Brothers, let’s teach these shameless scoundrels a lesson!” yet another voice shouted.
“Beat them!”
“Beat them to death!”
Among the more than nine hundred examinees, quite a few were brooding over their disappointing performances. Now, upon discovering cheaters, their pent-up frustration blazed into fury. In a surge, they descended upon the two fat brothers, raining down fists and kicks, some grabbing benches to smash over them, and others, not satisfied, simply leapt on them and bit with their teeth!
“Help... save... oof!” The two fat brothers struggled desperately, but it was useless, they were instantly swallowed by the crowd. At first, there were cries for help, but soon it turned into the wailing of slaughtered pigs.
As for Li Zhao, the instigator, he had long since retreated to a safe distance. While enjoying the spectacle, he put on an innocent face, as if he were the very picture of a well-behaved youth who never got into fights!
...
“What is all this commotion outside?”
“Reporting to the Left Chancellor, two candidates were caught bringing in cheat sheets, which sparked a brawl when they were discovered!”
“What? Such a thing has happened? Quickly, bring the cheaters for interrogation, and close the Ministry of Personnel’s gates at once. No one is to leave.”
“Yes, sir!”
The loud disturbance had alarmed the Left Chancellor, Li Shizhi. Upon understanding the situation, he immediately dispatched people to control the scene, to prevent further unrest.
A dozen blue-robed clerks rushed over, expending a great deal of effort to disperse the furious crowd. As for the brothers Li Chong and Li Fei, they were little more than two heaps of bruised flesh—noses flattened, front teeth knocked out, clothes torn to rags, their bodies covered with bite marks.
Fortunately, their layers of fat provided some protection, sparing their lives, though judging by their injuries, they’d be bedridden for quite some time!
Meanwhile, the cheat sheets were presented to Li Shizhi. He felt a brief sense of relief, only for his heart to tighten again.
The notes contained not only Confucian classics but also more than a dozen poems—on spring blossoms and autumn moons, summer breezes and winter snows, and various other topics—as well as several policy essays, including one on the issue of currency shortages.
Preparing so many answers meant the exam topics hadn’t been leaked; the cheaters were merely casting a wide net, hoping to cover as many likely questions as possible.
Since the exam topics hadn’t leaked, the situation wasn’t as grave as he had feared, which allowed Li Shizhi to breathe easier.
The troubling part was that this year’s exam had been set personally by Her Majesty, and yet the cheaters had managed to predict several topics with just a few poems and essays. What did this imply?
It meant that whoever composed these answers not only understood the Empress’s mind thoroughly but was also intimately familiar with state affairs. There were fewer than ten such individuals in the entire empire, and all were high-ranking ministers.
That court ministers of such stature might be involved in cheating—how could Li Shizhi not be alarmed?
Not daring to treat the matter lightly, Li Shizhi ordered his men to calm the angry candidates to prevent further escalation, while also launching a thorough interrogation of the brothers Li Chong and Li Fei, determined to get to the bottom of the cheating scandal.
Soon, the two fat brothers confessed. They had asked someone to prepare answers in advance, hoping to memorize them and thereby win a top spot in the exam; but they were too dull-witted. After days of rote learning at home, they still couldn’t remember everything, so they resorted to bringing in cheat sheets.
Candidates entering the hall were subject to strict searches and forbidden to carry anything with writing—how had the brothers managed to smuggle in the notes?
Though their scholarship was lacking, their cunning was not. They made full use of their physical advantage: their fat.
Both brothers had ample folds of flesh, especially around their bellies. They fashioned the answers into small booklets and concealed them within the layers of fat, carrying them into the hall.
These very booklets were their ticket through the exam—until that one fateful tumble exposed everything.
They confessed to everything except the identity of the person who had prepared the answers; on that point, their lips were sealed.
However, they did add one more thing: “Li Zhao was our accomplice!”
...
For a drowning man, the most desperately longed-for thing is a straw to grasp. If there is no straw, he may try to drag others down with him—the more the better—so all may perish together. Such is one of the uglier truths of human nature.
Li Chong and Li Fei were no longer merely drowning; they had fallen into a cesspit, and climbing out was impossible. So, steeling themselves, they decided to pull someone else down with them, choosing their old nemesis, Li Zhao.
“Punish the cheaters severely!”
“Punish the cheaters severely!”
...
The candidates were in an uproar once more. Were it not for the clerks and guards holding them back, another brawl would have erupted.
It wasn’t merely a matter of righteous indignation or hatred of cheating; it was personal interest. Consider: the court was only accepting 120 candidates this time. Each cheater eliminated meant one more spot, and thus one more chance for others to become officials. Naturally, their zeal was intense.
Meanwhile, Li Shizhi ordered his men to bring Li Zhao before him and studied the youth carefully. Li Zhao had rosy lips and white teeth, his features delicate and handsome—a standard young gentleman, pleasing to the eye.
But, as the saying goes, good looks do not guarantee good character. For example, during the Southern and Northern Dynasties, Xie Tiao was both handsome and talented. His poetry was so admired, even the immortal poet Li Bai extolled him: “The prose of Penglai has the mettle of Jian’an; among them, young Xie stands out with clarity.”
Yet, despite his gifts, Xie Tiao’s character was abysmal—greedy, lecherous, willing to sell out his own kin for profit, and a coward to boot. He died a violent death at thirty-six.
“Li Zhao, do you know the brothers Li Chong and Li Fei?”
“I do.”
“Very well. They have confessed, claiming you conspired with them to cheat. Is this true?”
“Honorable Left Chancellor, I swear it is not true!”
“Hmph! We’ll see soon enough—search him!... Men, search him!”
Two clerks stepped forward and searched Li Zhao thoroughly, from head to toe, inside and out—his hair, clothes, belt, boots, even his undergarments. And indeed, they found something.
A strangely shaped, sharp dagger!
A dozen three-edged throwing darts!
Dozens of polished copper coins, their edges filed into saw-teeth!
...
Li Shizhi and his companions exchanged glances. The youth before them appeared gentle and harmless, yet he carried so many deadly weapons—what was he planning?
But rules of the examination only forbade items with writing. These weapons were not forbidden and had no bearing on cheating.
Without evidence, there was no proof that Li Zhao had cheated. But what of the testimonies of Li Chong and Li Fei? Surely they would not falsely accuse someone without cause?
Under Tang law, falsely accusing another was itself a serious crime.
What to do?
An idea struck.
“As the saying goes, true gold fears no fire. Li Zhao, if your conscience is clear, would you dare let me test you myself?”
“Please proceed.”
“Very well. I will test your poetic talent. If you fail to compose a worthy poem, you shall be deemed a cheater—punished by caning and public humiliation!”
“If I fail to produce a worthy poem, I am willing to accept the charge of cheating and submit to the Left Chancellor’s judgment. But may I ask, if I do compose a fine poem, what then?”
Li Zhao took a step forward, meeting the gaze of Li Shizhi, his young face showing no sign of fear.
“Ha! Such boldness. If you truly compose a fine poem, I shall apologize to you before all, and extend my friendship, regardless of our difference in years!”
“Do you mean it?”
“A gentleman’s word is his bond.”
“Very well. Please set the topic.”
A sixteen-year-old youth daring to wager with the Chancellor of the Realm—this was truly extraordinary. The thousands present in the hall all held their breath, watching the drama unfold.
Some believed Li Zhao was bluffing and would soon be exposed. Others thought that, since he dared to accept the challenge, he must have something up his sleeve.
Meanwhile, Li Shizhi pondered, deciding to select an obscure topic to properly test the youth—nothing so commonplace as sun, moon, stars, or the four seasons. Something unusual... yes, that would do!
“There happens to be a bamboo grove outside the examination hall. Take ‘bamboo’ as your theme, and compose a poem within the time it takes for one stick of incense to burn.”
“Very well.”
Li Zhao fell into contemplation and, out of habit, began to pace—one, two, three, four, five... hesitated, then took two more steps, making seven in total!
“New Bamboo”
New shoots rise higher than the old,
Thanks to the sturdy trunks that uphold.
Next year, fresh life will spring again,
Dragon sons twine round the Phoenix Pool.
A wave of astonishment swept through the hall. Given a stick of incense’s time, yet he finished in seven steps? Was he comparing himself to Cao Zhi, famed for composing poetry in seven steps? Surely, he must have prepared in advance and just got lucky!
Yet none could deny that “New Bamboo” was a superior poem.
Little did they know, Li Zhao had completed the poem by the fifth step, but, not wishing to surpass Cao Zhi’s legend, he took two extra steps for modesty’s sake.
“Excellent. Might you compose another?”
“Please set the topic.”
“Then let it be this.” Li Shizhi glanced at a nearby table, where several steamed buns were arrayed, one bitten open to reveal golden crab roe within.
It was his own snack, interrupted by the earlier commotion.
Li Zhao said nothing, clasped his hands behind his back, and paced seven steps:
“Crab Bun”
Skillful hands praise the thin, delicate crust,
Fragrant osmanthus mingles with crab in a bun.
Holding a claw need not go to waste—
For even in humble huts, such treasures are won.
Such an obscure topic, yet he succeeded again. Amazement rippled through the audience.
“Young man, could you compose yet another?”
“Please set the topic.”
“Since you have praised the bun, why not praise the crab within?”
Li Zhao paced once more—seven steps:
“Ode to the Crab”
Untraveled to the sea, yet famed from the start,
Its bones arising from tender flesh apart.
Fearless of thunder or lightning’s might,
Even in the Dragon King’s court, it walks with impudent heart.
One might be luck, two perhaps, but three? The hall fell silent. Many began to wonder—could this Li Zhao truly be a prodigy?
Li Shizhi continued to set topics, each more obscure, and began to specify poetic forms: five-character, seven-character, quatrains, regulated verse... the challenges grew ever more difficult.
Li Zhao answered each with poise, never failing to produce a poem in just seven steps.
To make a long story short, by the time Li Zhao recited his tenth poem, all nine hundred candidates were convinced, filled with awe and admiration for him.
Cao Zhi composed in seven steps; so did Li Zhao. But recall—Cao Zhi was twenty-nine at the time; Li Zhao was merely sixteen.
Cao Zhi composed but one poem, while Li Zhao produced a continuous stream.
By comparison, the latter was clearly superior.
By the thirteenth poem, all twelve deputy examiners had yielded; some, disheartened, resolved to resign and go home once the exam was over. After decades of study, to be surpassed by a mere youth—how could they justify teaching others? Best to retire and care for their children.
By the seventeenth poem, Li Shizhi set no more topics. He studied Li Zhao anew, then rose and, with utmost respect, clasped his hands in salute.
The Chancellor of the Realm saluting a youth—such an honor was unprecedented, and a sincere apology indeed.
Li Zhao dared not be arrogant and returned the salute with a bow.
“I have investigated thoroughly. Li Zhao possesses genuine talent and learning, and there is not a trace of cheating. Does anyone present object?”
Li Shizhi asked three times. The hall remained silent. Hundreds of candidates were convinced—one with such poetic gift would hardly stoop to copying from others.